MARRIAGE OR WEDDING: A CONFUSION

Hi,

I’m an important word in everybody’s life. I’m the cause of happiness, joy and security to many of you. Sometimes I am blamed for your failures. In reality it all depends on how your attitude is towards fellow beings and especially your better (?) half.

I stop talking about life because my purpose is to tell you how, as a word and as a part of language, I am misunderstood and misused. Yes, I am the word ‘marriage’.

Let me introduce my clan members.

Wedding: This fellow is often confused with me-‘marriage’

You may wonder what the difference is.

Actually ‘marriage’ is related to customs or legality of getting married.

You can call it a Contract in legal terms. We can say that it is a religious ceremony.

Then what is ‘Wedding’?

It is a part of marriage.

Wedding is the occasion of marriage and the connected celebrations.

Example:

A friend is to get married soon. Ask him “Will you invite us to your wedding?”

Do not ask “Will you invite us to your marriage?”

Marry: Is closely related to me.

You can also use ‘marry’ without preposition.

Example:

Before Williams married Kate, he had asked her to marry him.

Get marry: is another cousin of mine. It prefers to enjoy the company of 'to'.

Example:

Williams is getting married to Kate.

Let me finish here with a request. Please do not curse me for your failures. I am after all a ‘word’. Your life only gives more real and deeper meaning to me.

I wish you all happy married life.

Bye.

Hare and Tortoise: A team of winners

This is a well known story. It is about the little *Hare and Tortoise. One day Hare called for a race between them; Tortoise accepted it with reluctance. It thought that it might not win, it was really absurd to have a competition between not so much equal competitors. Their common friend Eagle was the judge.

The running race began. Hare was very fast and confident. Within the first 15 minutes, Hare had taken a huge lead, leaving the tortoise to eat its dust far behind. Hare had a feeling of assurance; believed that everything was under its control; so it decided to take a nap. In his over confidence, he thought that a short rest wouldn’t hurt his chances since the little tortoise was no where in sight. He had a nap which evolved into a deep slumber. After an hour Eagle shouted at it “Get up; you are defeated.” It was a totally unexpected shock. The ‘Slow and steady’ won the race. Our Hare had a guilty feeling. It knew that the reason for failure was procrastination caused by laziness and indifference.

Then Hare requested for another round. It was immediately granted by Eagle. This time our subdued Hare was ‘confident and fast’; Tortoise unwillingly followed ‘Shall I have the same luck today?’ But the vigilant Hare won.

Tortoise, on its part, thoughtfully put up a challenge to Hare for a long distant race: That was up to the foothills of the far away mountain ranges. Hare, as usual, started with all vigor. Suddenly he had to stop in front of an endless sheath of cold water which was between the mountain and him. Without second thoughts it took an immediate decision and ran along the bunds of the great blue lake. When it reached the foothills, he saw the tortoise taking his turn of nap across the finish line after crossing the lake successfully.

Then next day Eagle smilingly told “Now it is my chance to make you both run for the title. Let me inform the conditions.” After a minute it announced “My dear Friends, you are going to have the same race like yesterday. But you must complete it within two hours.”

For a moment both of them felt confused; Hare thought that it might not be possible for both of them to reach the target. The wise tortoise suggested “My dear, I have an idea. You are fast on land; I am fast on water; shall we work together?”

The sharp Hare picked up the cue and told “That is precisely what I am also thinking. From this second it is not ‘YOU or I’ but it is ‘WE’ the team.”

Hare carried the little tortoise on its back; then in water it traveled on the back of tortoise. It took one hour and fifty minutes. From a tree top Eagle watched everything with satisfaction and felt proud about the egoless achievement of both of its friends.

************************************************************************

*Names of characters: Hare, Tortoise and Eagle.

_{A note on ‘might’}:

Usually most of us, who have English as second language, are shy of using ‘might’. Some people think that ‘might’ is the past form of ‘May’.

But ‘May’ and ‘Might’ mean the same.

E.g. Hare thought that it might be possible to win.

‘Might’ is used when ever we are less sure of things or actions. ‘May’ can also be used in the same sense. Both can be used in future or present tenses

Example: It might/may rain tomorrow.

‘May and Might’ are also used in conveying permissions and requests.

Newton's third law of motion, Focus and Success

When I heard his story, suddenly it dawned on me that Newton’s Third Law and this story have some striking relationship. I think you might also have the same feeling after reading this.

Near the thick forests of Westernghats, our man was a famous hero; an unequalled archer; easily the best hunter among the villagers around. If he set his eyes on any flying or running being, everyone was sure that the poor thing would be destined to have only a few more minutes to live and enjoy the life.

One day a minister came on an inspection to the village. Naturally our friend had to accompany him to the forest. The minister was amazed and simply carried away by the prowess of our hero.

“Dear Son, Come to the festival at the palace and win a thousand gold coins and a job in the army. There is no one in our country to equal your skills as far as my knowledge goes”. He went back to the capital leaving our hero stunned in an elated joy and pride. Hero’s wife started dreaming of jewels and hero, on his part, thought of a palatial house as an officer in the army.

The day came. Many villagers accompanied him. Our friend looked sharply at the target and closed his eyes in a prayer like posture. Within his closed eyes he could not avoid visualizing the palatial house with his wife waiting at the entrance with all those weighty glittering jewels. After a second, he released the arrow.

Alas! Unexpectedly it got past the target. The entire crowd saw the first failure of our hero.

The minister came to him and told “Son, you had two aims .. two targets in your mind."

Our hero in a slightly broken voice asked ‘Really ..I….I could not understand what you said. Please guide me to success.’

The wise minister told ‘Son, when I saw you in forests, your arrows pierced many animals and fast flying birds successfully. During those moments Your entire focus was on action. You did not think of gifts. Even you did not expect my appreciation. Now it is not so. You were disturbed by the thought of thousand gold coins. So, the focus got eroded; consequently, you missed the mark. I think, now, you understand’.

He won next time with only one aim and target.

How?

Eighteen years later he told his son 'Dhanush, when I got the next chance, I just concentrated on my target. My only thought at that moment was I should hit that fast rotating wooden-bird. And I won.'

'I couldn't understand.' replied the confused son.

'Dear, it is just like throwing the ball on a wall. Don't you get it back? Do you remember that You planted a mango tree ten years ago. Now it gives us the fruits. Actions ....followed by reactions.'

'Yes dad. Now it is clear.'

'You are going to higher studies tomorrow. Remember my story. Forget marks, forget jobs; but give concentrated effort to what you are doing at that moment. Study. Excel yourself every time. You need to compete with you only . Rest will follow naturally and automatically.This law of nature never changes.'

Now let us have a look at the third law: For every action there is equal and opposite reaction.

Is it not a quite good psychology to do some thing perfectly and let the nature allow us reap what we sow in the past?

Is it not that we can face any crisis if we invest our best to-day, without the anxieties or expectations of tomorrows?

Another thing: Doesn’t it sound like Bagavat Geetha’s ‘Do your duty, expect not the fruits’?

NOW READ AGAIN –

NEWTON’S THIRD LAW=FOCUS=SUCCESS.

Do you accept?